What makes an ideal present for a monster?

Five pairs of gloves one for each hand.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What kind of watch is best for people who don't like time on their hands?

A pocket watch.

How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood?

He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.

Glove Jokes More Glove Jokes

What present did the kid with no hands get?

Gloves. Ha! Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.

What did Michael get for his birthday?

Gloves... Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet Knock, knock Who is it Not Michael

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

Why did you buy me a pair of bunny ears?

I wanted you to have a hoppy birthday!

Why did Joseph Goebbels own a pair of binoculars?

For proper gander purposes.

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

How does a monster begin a fairy tale?

Once upon a slime...

Why did the monster paint himself in rainbow colors?

Because he wanted to hide in the crayon box.