Glove Jokes

What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding he couldn't open it to find out

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What did the mittens say on their wedding day?

I glove you.

What did the little boy with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened them yet.

What do you get a kid without arms for Christmas?

Gloves, but he doesn't know that yet.. since he can't open it.

Why didn't the panda use a glove when playing baseball?

Because he caught everything bear handed!

What's red and green and wears boxing gloves?

A fruit punch.

What kind of present did the armless boy get for Christmas?

Gloves. Jk he hasn't opened it yet!!

How do those even fit in your pants?

He replied "They fit like a glove."

What did one hand say to the other?

Help, I think I'm in glove".

What did the boy with no hands get for a Christmas present?

Gloves.... Just kidding he hasn't got into it yet.

What present did the kid with no hands get?

Gloves. Ha! Just kidding, I don't know what he got, he hasn't opened it yet.

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How do you think his pants fit him?

Like a glove.

What makes an ideal present for a monster?

Five pairs of gloves one for each hand.

What has four fingers and a thumb but is not alive?

A glove.) First response: "My Aunt Lydia."

What did the finger say to the thumb?

I'm in glove with you.

What did the child with no arms get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why didn't the dog speak to his foot?

Because it's not polite to talk back to your paw!

Why do dogs lick their balls?

Because they can.

Panda Jokes More Panda Jokes

Why didn't the panda use a glove when playing baseball?

Because he caught everything bear handed!

Where do Pandas live?

On the road to Extinction.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What's the difference between men and government bonds?

Bonds mature.

What did Nietzsche tell his editor when he finished writing Thus Spoke Zarathustra?

It's over, man.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What does Dracula write on his Christmas cards?

Best vicious of the season

What's Scrooge's favourite Christmas game?

Mean-opoly.

Baseball Jokes More Baseball Jokes

What do you get when you combine Soccer and Baseball?

Golbat.

Why can't Bane play baseball?

He always breaks the bat.

Expert Jokes More Expert Jokes

What do you call an expert that studies sign language?

A signtist!

How did experts know Princess Diana had dandruff?

They found her Head & Shoulders in the glove compartment.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What did the science teacher say when the kid was experimenting with magnets?

May the force be with you

What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?

A trip without kids.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why doesn't Ganon use the Internet?

There were too many Links.

What did soviet russians use for lighting before they started using candles?

Electricity.