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What did the pirate say with the steering wheel in his pants?

Arrgh, it's driving me nuts!

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Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

Why are pirates, pirates?

They just.

What did the proctologist say to the pirate?

Show me your booty.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

How do you know when you're too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and realize it was your air freshener

Where do we go?

Me: Left Axl: Where do we go now Me: Straight. Axl: Oh, where do we go now Me: Damn it, Axl, let me drive!

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What does a nut say when it sneezes?

Cashew.

What does trail mix have in common with a nursing home?

They're both filled with nuts

Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

How do Vampires buy pants if they can't look in a mirror?

Now, I tweet them

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

In case they get a hole in one!

Steering Wheel Jokes More Steering Wheel Jokes

What did the pirate say when he had a steering wheel down his pantaloons?

Arr! It's driving me nuts!

Why did the blonde have lipstick all over her steering wheel?

She was trying to blow the horn