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What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding he couldn't open it to find out

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why are you always rushing out of here after work?

You're single with no kids." Me: " Exactly."

What kind of medicine do you give a kid having a fit?

An anti-hissy-tamine.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why couldn't the hunter cook breakfast?

The game warden found out he poached his eggs!

What did Bernie Sanders say when he found a dead body at a Democratic Party meeting to select candidates and decide policy?

Oh god, a caucus!" cuz he has a new england accent

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did a blind French guy said he wanted for Christmas?

All I want for Christmas is yeux

What did the hobo get for Christmas?

Nothing.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why do you hold your hand flat above your eyes when you look into the distance?

Because when you would cover your eyes with your hand, you wouldn't see sh*t. I'm lame.

Why didn't the panda use a glove when playing baseball?

Because he caught everything bear handed!

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What do computers and air conditioners have in common?

Neither work when you open windows.

Why did the guitarist keep his condoms in his guitar case?

He only needed them after he'd opened it.

Glove Jokes More Glove Jokes

What has four fingers and a thumb but is not alive?

A glove.) First response: "My Aunt Lydia."

What did one hand say to the other?

Help, I think I'm in glove".