What is the best way to talk to a vampire?

By long distance.

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Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

How many controlled oposition does it take to change a light bulb?

None you know of. Since they signed a Non Disclosure Agreement to not talk about it.

What did the cold pipe say to the to hot pipe?

Nothing,pipes can't talk. Thank you

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What is the best way to speak to a ghoul?

From a long ways away.

What is the best way to determine if someone is ticklish?

Give them a "test tickle."

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

How can you tell a vampire has a cold?

They start coffin.

What would happen if you were to cross two snowmen with three vampires?

You would get severe frostbite.

Long Distance Jokes More Long Distance Jokes

How do pirates agree with each other over long distances?

With their aye-phones.

What's the difference between Americans and Brits?

Brits think 200 miles is a long distance, Americans think 200 years is a long time.