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Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What does a tree do when it wants to go home?

It leaves.

What do guns and millennials have in common?

You need to keep them in a safe space if you don't want them triggered.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?

Stop playing it cagey!

When is the earliest time of day Nintendo fans play games?

The Wii hours of the morning.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What Happens when you fart in church?

You sit in your own pew

What sits down but doesn't get back up?

A redditor.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What does a proofreader have in common with a vampire?

They search for type-os

What did the vampire call his false teeth?

A new fangled device.

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What game do monsters play with humans?

Squash.

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs! A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.