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Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you say to a twenty ton dinosaur with headphones on?

Anything you want. He can't hear you.

What did the zombie farmer say he wanted?

Grrraaaaiiinnns...

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

How does Jared like to play his flute?

In A minor.

What do a man and a rubix cube have in common?

The longer you play with them, the harder they get.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What did the puppy say when he sat on sand paper?

RUFF!

What do you get when you sit under a cow?

A pat on the head.

Pumpkin Jokes More Pumpkin Jokes

What did the pumpkin say after waking up his family?

Awaken, my pump-

Why is Halloween a hillbilly's favorite holiday?

Because they like to pumpkin.

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do you call a vampire that can lift up cars?

Jack-u-la!

What kind of eye disease do vampires get?

Dracular degeneration.

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs! A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.

What do you get if you squash a house?

A flat.