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Pumpkin Jokes

What did the pumpkin say after waking up his family?

Awaken, my pump-

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Why does Cinderella never win the Olympics?

She has a pumpkin for a coach and runs away from the ball.

Why was Cinderella bad at basketball?

Because her coach was always a pumpkin.

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

How is Halloween celebrated in Kentucky?

Pumpkin

What's with the knives?

Wait, stop. Please stop!" - pumpkin

Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

Why is Halloween a hillbilly's favorite holiday?

Because they like to pumpkin.

Why couldn't Cinderella play football very well?

Her coach was a pumpkin

What do Mountain folk do on Halloween?

Pumpkin.

Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?

They have no hands to knock on the door.

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Cinderella Jokes More Cinderella Jokes

Why didn't Cinderella makes the Soccer Team?

She kept running away from the ball

Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

Tumblr Jokes More Tumblr Jokes

What's the name of the car of a hipster Batman?

Tumblr.

What is Kanye West's favourite kind of omelette?

Omeletteyoufinish -stolen from raininginreverse on tumblr.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How do you make an internet addict wait?

I'll tell you later.

Where are you when you're in the U.K. waiting for Vietnamese soup?

Pho queue

Tumblr User Jokes More Tumblr User Jokes

Where do Tumblr users go to pray?

The Cis-Teen Chapel

What do you call a Tumblr user who identifies as a device which inflates a tire?

A pumpkin!

Coach Jokes More Coach Jokes

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 15 black guys?

Coach.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys?

Coach.

Pumpkin Patch Jokes More Pumpkin Patch Jokes

How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern?

You use a pumpkin patch.

How do you fix a Jack O Latern?

With a pumpkin patch!

Jack O Lantern Jokes More Jack O Lantern Jokes

How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern?

With a pumpkin patch!

Sport Jokes More Sport Jokes

What are your best Sports Team jokes?

With the NHL season getting started tonight. I am wondering what are you best jokes making fun off sports teams. All Sports (Baseball,hockey,football, soccer etc).

Why is the sport of cricket called cricket?

A: