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Pump Jokes

What did the pumpkin say after waking up his family?

Awaken, my pump-

Your Age Is Only Math
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What do you call a family that runs a gas station?

Pump kin.

What do Hillbillies do for Halloween?

Pump kin

What's a hillbillies favorite holiday? Halloween.... Do you want to know why?

Because they like to pump kin.

Why are jack-o-lanterns inbred?

Because they pump-kin

Who would win in a fight?

A bicycle wheel or an old book Well, it's hard to say. One's pumped and the other's ripped.

How do you pump a Republican for information?

With a plunger.

What do they do in West Virginia for Halloween?

Pump Kin

How do you get your stomach pumped?

Swallow a speaker playing "Remember the Name"

How can you tell when Ron Jeremy is finished pumping gas?

He pulls out the nozzle and sprays it all over the car!

How do red necks celebrate Halloween?

Pump kin

We've Got This Love Thing Down
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How do you pump up a room full of shy introverts?

LETS GET READY TO MUMBLE!!!

How does a physicist exercise?

By pumping ion!

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West Virginia Jokes More West Virginia Jokes

What do you call a virgin in West Virginia?

An only child....

What's the name of West Virginia's version of Winnie the Pooh?

Gummy Bear

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What will Kayne West's political leaning be if he runs for President?

West wing

Why did the Eskimos have to stop partying?

Because they ran out of Natural Light

Hillbilly Jokes More Hillbilly Jokes

Why did the hillbillies save some doe?

Because they knew it would give them a buck in good time.

What's a hillbillies favorite holiday? Halloween.... Do you want to know why?

Because they like to pump kin.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What's that awful thing called... M: ... J: You wake up with it after you drink?

M: Linda.

Why does a montonegran man keep a chair next to his bed?

So he can have a rest after he gets tired from waking up.

Spare Time Jokes More Spare Time Jokes

What does a Redhead with a yeast infection like to do in her spare time?

Make Gingerbread

What does a mod do in their spare time?

Deleted

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?

For Drizzle.

Why are people still using a dictionary?

I just type the words into Google and see if it corrects me.

Ear Jokes More Ear Jokes

How do you find your dog if he's lost in the woods?

Put your ear up to a tree and listen for the bark!

What did the tomato say to the ear of corn?

Nothing, as tomatoes lack any ability to communicate.

Cream Jokes More Cream Jokes

What's the best kind of cream......to get rid of spots and bug bites?

Creamation.

What's the difference between your boyfriend and whipped cream?

The cream