What's the difference between a garbanzo pea and a chick pea?

I've never had a garbanzo pea on my face.

This joke may have profanity.

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What's the difference between fog and mist?

If you hit it its fog, if you don't it's mist.

What's the difference between a burger and a burglar?

Cooking times.

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What did the scientist see when he looked up his family tree?

A gorilla pooped on his face.

How can I face the problem?

When my problem is my face!

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What's the difference between a lentil and a chick pea?

I won't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face.

What's the difference between a chick pea and a potato?

You would pay to have a potato on you...