What's the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon?

I can get through one of his skits without laughing

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What's the difference between arguing with a girl and arguing with a knife?

The knife has a point

What's the difference between a house cleaner and a thief?

The way they enter your house.

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Why couldn't the octopus stop laughing?

Because it had ten tickles

What do you call an outdated joke that, while sharp, has little potential for laughs?

I used to know, but then I took an arrow to the knee

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Whats the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon?

I can get through his opening monologue without laughing

What's the difference between me and Jimmy Fallon?

I can get through one of his skits without laughing