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What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How many times do you have to tickle a squid to make it laugh?

Ten tickles

What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What did one deer say to the other after leaving the bar?

I can't believe you just blew 50 bucks in there

Why was the orphan so successful?

When he was told to "go big or go home," he only had one option. (I've posted this joke here before, but I believe I've been the first, so if you recognize it as a repost it's because I wanted to tell it again!)

Peace Jokes More Peace Jokes

What did the BMW say to the Audi on the side of the road?

Rust-in-peace.

Why is there all this hate against necromancers?

They are just trying to raise a family in peace.