What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

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Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

How do you build a flea circus?

You have to start from scratch.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why did the policeman stay in bed today?

He was undercover *!*

How do I look today?

Bruno Mars: "When I see your faceeee" Girl: "Ok ok I get it."

Inside Jokes More Inside Jokes

What do you call a hula hoop with a nail on the inside?

A Navel Destroyer.

What's black on the outside but yellow on the inside?

Ninja chicken.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What did one casket say to the other casket?

Hey, is that you coffin? Ba-dum-tsk...

What's the difference between a condom and a coffin?

Well, both carry stiffs, but one's for coming and the other's for going.

Elvis Presley Jokes More Elvis Presley Jokes

Why can't Elvis Presley roll backwards with his car?

Because he is dead

Why can't Elvis Presley drive?

Cause he's dead.