What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

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Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

Why does homemade bread not make your throat itch?

It's made from scratch

What would George Washington do if he were alive right now?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why did the train go left?

Cause it couldn't get on the right track. I made that joke when I was little and remembered it today, might as well post it.

What was the humor like back then?

I was just wondering about how many jokes today maybe irrelevant 100 years into the future. To test this theory, what are the oldest recorded jokes?

Inside Jokes More Inside Jokes

What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?

The vacuum has the dirtbag on the inside.

What is the difference between a cello and a coffin?

The coffin has the corpse on the inside.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What would they put on his coffin?

A lid!

What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

Elvis Presley Jokes More Elvis Presley Jokes

Why can't Elvis Presley roll backwards with his car?

Because he is dead

Why can't Elvis Presley drive?

Cause he's dead.