Whats big, pink, long and my girlfriend hates when I put it in her mouth?

Our miscarriage.

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Whats better then getting a gold medal in the Paralympics?

Walking.

Whats the similarity between a reddit user and a vulture?

Both are dead inside.

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What's a zombie say when he gets a letter from his girlfriend?

It's a dead letter day.

What did the hummingbird do to his girlfriend?

He nectar!

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Why does Barbie hate Amazon?

Because they're always putting sales out on ken-dolls.

What do you call someone who hates people without toes and can't have ice cream?

Lack-toes intolerant

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed?

To catch her false teeth.

What is juicy on the inside, dry on the outside, and has "apple" in it?

A roasted baby with an apple in its mouth.

Miscarriage Jokes More Miscarriage Jokes

Whats big, pink, long and my girlfriend hates when I put it in her mouth?

Our miscarriage.

What word starts with M and ends in arraige and is a man's favourite thing?

Miscarriage. This joke never gets old, just like the baby.