When Bruce decides to do stand-up, what will his stage-name be?

Penny Bruce

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What does a clever sentry on guard duty say when he wakes up to see his commanding officer standing over him?

Amen

Why are dolphins cleverer than humans?

Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish!

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds?

Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!

Why did the Soviets decide to be Russian?

Cuz they got tired of Stalin.

Stage Jokes More Stage Jokes

What did you say?

Me: Judge Did you just reverse my sentence *Stage dives into cheering jury*

What did the Dalai Llama play on stage at Glastonbury?

Yakmanninov

Bruce Jokes More Bruce Jokes

What DOESN'T Bruce want for Christmas from his ex?

A Krismas goose.

What's the difference between bruce banner and bruce jenner?

One turned into a terrifying monster, the other is an avenger.