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When someone asks, "How are you?

I say, "5-7-8-3" because they don't care how I am & saying my ATM Code out loud helps me memorize it.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the depressed, illiterate pepperoni slice say when asked where he was with his life?

Well it pizza heck out of me.

What did the pot-smoking alien say when asked what toppings he wanted on his sammich?

Ayy lil' mayo.

Care Jokes More Care Jokes

What does the H. in Jesus H. Christ stand for?

Hallmark. God cares enough to send the very best.

How many redditors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Who cares, because How Can Light Be Real If Our Eyes Arent Real?

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

Why was 4 afraid of 5?

Because 5 was a Registered Six Offender. Edit: a word.

What weebles and wobbles but can't get up?

Grandpa having a seizure. Bonus: Statistically speaking, 1 in 5 adult men

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grief process.

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

Memorize Jokes More Memorize Jokes

What's your favorite medical joke?

I've memorized a lot of jokes from a previous "doctor joke" thread, and need some fresh material!

When someone asks, "How are you?

I say, "5-7-8-3" because they don't care how I am & saying my ATM Code out loud helps me memorize it.