What do you call a fruit that won't get married?

A Cantaloupe.

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What do you call two fruits that can't get married?

Cantaloupes

Why do honeydew melons have to get married in a formal ceremony?

Because they cantaloupe.

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Why do melons tend to have large weddings?

They cantaloupe

What did the one melon say to the other melon?

We're too young to marry. We cantaloupe.

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What do you need to drink out of a fruit?

A STRAWberry....I'll go...

Why do people buy fruit already cut up?

There's only like 7 things in life easier than cutting up fruit and one of them is farting.