Why do people buy fruit already cut up?

There's only like 7 things in life easier than cutting up fruit and one of them is farting.

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why did the hearing aid saleman give it up for a life of piracy?

Because he only made a good buccaneer.

What is every blonde's ambition in life?

To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How do people know spiders are more afraid of me than I am of them?

Like, did you ask him Because only one of us is screaming right now.

Why are people leaving the Ukraine?

I don't know but they sure are Russian.

Fart Jokes More Fart Jokes

Who farted?

Best game of Highway Jeopardy ever.

What do you call someone who never farts in public?

A PRIVATE TUTOR

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Who the hell buys furniture online?

Why would you buy a chair or couch you can't even sit in What if it has burlap cushions stuffed w/hay

What did the mama pig say when junior pig bought a basket of wormy apples?

Don't tell the farmer. He might charge us extra.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

How did the Roman cut his hair?

Caesar

What gets longer the more you cut it at both ends?

A ditch.

7 Jokes More 7 Jokes

What is 6 afraid of 7?

Because size matters.

How much time do I have left, doctor?

Doctor: 10 Guy: 10 what! 10 days, 10 months, 10 years Doctor: 9...8...7...6...5...

Fruit Jokes More Fruit Jokes

What did the fruit say to the vegetable before dinner?

Lettuce, pray.

What do you call a fruit that makes fun of someone?

A banana-nana-nana Got it on a popsicle stick. Laughed for way too long.