Who is going to win tonight's presidential election?

The Voyager Probe, speeding away from Earth at 38,000 mph.

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Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Whats the word im looking for?

You're part of a three-man space crew orbiting Earth. You can ONLY relay one, one word message in 2 seconds. Whats the word

What music do they play in a Mexican bathroom?

Earth wind and fire

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What body part never seems to win?

The feet.

How did I win a Super Smash Bros. Brawl Tournament?

I met a knight

Speed Jokes More Speed Jokes

What did the doctor say to the speeding commuter?

Thank you for your patients.

Why was the Muslim arrested for speeding during Ramadan?

Because he was going *to fast*!

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

What does a lonely Sean Connery building IKEA products say?

I guess its jusht me, myshelf, and I tonight.

What did the plate say to the mug?

Food's on me tonight.