What did the asteroid say when his trajectory missed earth?

I guess I didn't plan it very well!

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

Where are you only allowed to swim if you have red hair, a lip piercing, three brothers, a missing finger, are slightly overweight and have a birthday in December?

The specific ocean.

Why are Taylor Swift's songs always a hit?

WARNING POKEMON JOKE) Because swift never misses.

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Why did the Moon break up with Earth?

The Moon said they were slowly drifting apart.

What is the only thing on earth that goes "ha ha" on a Monday?

A bit late, but.... A blonde who heard a joke on Friday.

Plan Jokes More Plan Jokes

What did one architect say to the other?

I see the floor in your plan.

How do astronauts plan a party?

They planet. (Plan-et)

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What did the colours red and violet say to one another when they couldn't agree in their debate?

I guess we're just on different ends of the spectrum.

How is life at the post office going?

It's going well I guess. It has its usps and it's downs. Edited for correctness

Asteroid Jokes More Asteroid Jokes

Why're they called hemorrhoids?

Surely they should be called asteroids?:

Why are asteroids so strong when they hit the planet?

Because they take a steroid.