Who is Thor?

A very worn-out thuper hero. (An excerpt from Brother Time and the Turtle: More Excuses for Jokes: )

This joke may have profanity.

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Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why did the Chinese Government cross the road?

THE PUNCHLINE OF THIS JOKE HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLES REPUBLIC OF CHINA, PLEASE REMAIN CALM WHILE WE WILL DEAL WITH THE OP IN A CIVIL MANNER.

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who gives a cluck (I wonder if the moderators will censor this joke merely on the grounds that it is categorically terrible)

Excuse Jokes More Excuse Jokes

How do you hit those high notes?

Adam Levine: I sold my soul to the devil. Interviewer: Excuse me Adam Levine: Practice.

What's your excuse?

Well my dad says the world is changing every day. So I decided to wait until it settles down!

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What do race car drivers wear under their fire retardant suits?

Speedos!

What's blue and white and sits up a tree?

A fridge wearing a denim jacket.

Thor Jokes More Thor Jokes

Why was Thor so worried about his hair looking good?

Because he is a Norsissist.

Why do Norse gods never ice skate?

Because the ice always Thors.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a turtle?

A cross. The animals around it have no effect on its name duh.

What's a Ninja Turtle's favorite equation?

A radical equation.