Thor Jokes

What's the difference between a stubbed toe and an Asgard hero?

Nothing they are both Thor.

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What do you call a Norse god after a workout?

Thor

Why did Thor decide to sleep in?

He was up all night to Get Loki.

Why do Norse gods never ice skate?

Because the ice always Thors.

Why did Thor not invite many people to his brother's wedding?

Because it was Low key

Why did no one notice Thor's brother?

Because he was low-key

Why is it so hard to find Thor's brother?

Because he stays low key

Why did Thor sit comfortably on a cactus?

He has an Asgard...

Why was Thor so worried about his hair looking good?

Because he is a Norsissist.

Why didn't Thor like the party?

It was too Loki.

How does Thor's brother like to party?

He likes to keep it pretty Lo-key

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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Why can't Thor play the piano or hide n seek with his brother?

He can never find the Loki.

Why was Thor disappointed by his birthday party?

Because it was more Loki than he wanted.

Why is Thor's brother always overlooked?

Because he's low key.

Why is Thors bother so secretive?

Because he tries to keep things Loki...

What did Thor say to the weaver fixing his cape?

What are your Hemsworth?

What did the god of lightning say after working out for the first time?

I'm Thor

Who is Thor?

A very worn-out thuper hero. (An excerpt from Brother Time and the Turtle: More Excuses for Jokes: )

Who would be Sub Zero's perfect rival in the Marvel Universe?

Thor.

What did Mike Tyson ask the really tired Norse god?

Are you Thor

Why did Thor file a police report?

Because someone stole his thunder

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Why doesn't Thor of the insect world use a hammer?

He's already got a Thor Axe.

How did Thor's brother get his powers?

Just Loki I guess

What did the Norse goddess say to Thor when he drunk dialed her?

I aint no Valhalla back girl.

Who is the only superhuman Frozone can't deal with?

Thor.

How did The Hulk feel after trying to lift Mjolnir?

He felt Thor.

Why wasn't Thor invited to his brother's surprise party?

Odin wanted to keep it 'Loki'.

What did Thor have to wear when he broke his tailbone?

An Asgard.

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Nordic Jokes More Nordic Jokes

What do Luke Bryant and a Nordic breast plate have on common?

They're on Thor.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

How did Jesus stay in shape?

Crossfit

Where is the safest place to stay at Ferguson?

The public pool, if it is too crowded try the library.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why do women aged 40+ not play hide and seek?

Cause nobody would be looking for them.

Why did Harrison Ford Crash his plane?

Because he was flying solo and went look no hans...

Thor Brother Jokes More Thor Brother Jokes

How did Thor's brother get his powers?

Just Loki I guess

Why did no one notice Thor's brother?

Because he was low-key

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Why did the man sleep after being run over by a car?

Because he got tired.

What did the silly boy take his bicycle to bed with him?

Because he didn't want to walk in his sleep.

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What if we need to hide bodies?

Me: I love you.

How does an elephant climb a tree?

He hides in an acorn and waits for a bird to carry him up.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning?

A midnight snack A hot Breakfast

Why is Christopher Walken so tired?

Because at night, he's always sleepwalken

Norse Jokes More Norse Jokes

What do you call getting a movie about Norse gods from the Internet?

DownlOdin. What do you call getting a movie about Norse gods from the Internet illegally? Thorrenting.

What did the Norse goddess say to Thor when he drunk dialed her?

I aint no Valhalla back girl.