Whole Foods Cashier: Do you have your grocery bags?

Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What are you doing, dad?

Filing taxes... LOLJK... I'm googling "non-extraditable countries". Pack your bags, kid! We're going to Libya!"

What did the science teacher say when the kid was experimenting with magnets?

May the force be with you

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

How many Man U. fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to change the lightbulb and one to drive down to Kent to pick him/her up.

Why are you driving on the sidewalk?

Motorist: It's too dangerous on the street.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

How do you milk sheeps?

With Apple accessories.

What's the difference between an apple and a hormone?

You can't hear an apple

Apple Pie Jokes More Apple Pie Jokes

What did the apple say to the apple pie?

You've got some crust.

Why is a praying muslim like apple pie with ice cream?

Both are in *a la mode*.

Grocery Bag Jokes More Grocery Bag Jokes

Whole Foods Cashier: Do you have your grocery bags?

Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.

What is the difference between michael jackson and a grocery bag?

One is white, plastic, and dangerous for your kids to play with and the other holds your groceries