Why did the apple pie get fired from his job?

Because he showed up baked.

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Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

How did you get those horrible burns?

Flashback to me enjoying some hot soup on a rollercoaster* I saved a litter of puppies from a fire.

Whats the difference between a hippie on fire and a lifetime supply of patchouli?

I don't wish for a lifetime supply every time I smell patchouli.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How about something personal?

Me: Personally I need a job.

What's the difference between an Art major and a guy who mops bathrooms at KFC?

One has a job.

Apple Pie Jokes More Apple Pie Jokes

How do terrorists like their apple pie?

Allah mode.

What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie?

Puff pastry!