Why are hipsters the oldest known form of life?

They were on the Earth before it was cool.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did you learn in school today Son: How to write Mother: What did you write?

Son: I don't know they haven't taught us how to read yet!

How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?

Your head hits the ceiling!

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What's the best moment of your life?

Me: That time I won a stuffed dino- wife: That didn't involve a dinosaur me: Our wedding

Why am I just so naturally funny?

Because my life is a joke. Dont worry Im not scuicidal

Earth Jokes More Earth Jokes

Who is going to win tonight's presidential election?

The Voyager Probe, speeding away from Earth at 38,000 mph.

What did the asteroid say when his trajectory missed earth?

I guess I didn't plan it very well!

Hipster Jokes More Hipster Jokes

Why did the hipster drown?

Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ()

Why did the hipster only listen to dead musicians?

So he could say he listened to them when they were underground.