Because the fine bros would sue.
It ran out of juice.
The pig replies, "I won her in a raffle."
He'll be all "Whoa... How'd you know my name, bro "
Don't taste me, bro!
Sue she
Sue
Deflated
Because it was a noble gas
Gee, it's hard to say, although he did seem pretty shaken up about it.
HALO HALO HALO!* - inspired from the Superbowl XLV11 Half-Time show
Turn of madden and go to bed. (I'm an eagles fan)