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Why did the guitarist keep his condoms in his guitar case?

He only needed them after he'd opened it.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What has six eyes but cannot see?

Three men in a house with dirty dishes in the sink, laundry that needs to be folded and kids that need a bath

How many spoiled rich girls does it take......to change a light bulb?

Just one, she yells, "DAAAAADDY, I need a new house!"

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Why were the ants dancing on top of the jar of jam?

It said "twist to open"

Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars?

Because it's his only chance to open the door to Number 10!

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

How do you know when a guy is really in love with his girlfriend?

When he starts using condoms with other girls.

What's the worst thing that could happen if you don't use a condom?

Your parents would know!

Guitarist Jokes More Guitarist Jokes

What does a guitarist say when he gets to his gig?

Would you like fries with that?

Why did the guitarist leave his guitar on the ground?

It didn't have any pickups