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Why did the hipster burn his tongue?

Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.

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Tongue Jokes More Tongue Jokes

Whats another term for acid?

Its on the tip of my tongue...

What tastes good but doesn't smell good?

A tongue.

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

Where did Nicholas II of Russia get his coffee?

Tsarbucks.

Why shouldn't you have coffee while on the clock?

Because that would be "grounds" for termination!

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why did you burn that building down?

Me: Because they keep sending emails after unsubscribing. Cop: You're free to go.

Why do you want to run for President?

Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories.

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What does a college kid do when confronted by an evil spirit?

He drinks it just like he drinks every other kind of spirit.

What kind of wine do bears drink?

Maulbec