Why did the skydiver die before reaching the ground?

Because he reached terminal velocity.

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster?

I'M BREADY TO DIE

Why did John F. Kennedy die?

He was too open-minded.

Reach Jokes More Reach Jokes

Why do receipts need to be 75 feet long?

I reach into my pocket thinking I have a wad of cash, turns out I just bought a soda earlier.

How many dead whores does it take to change a light bulb?

More than three, I still can't reach it.

Ground Jokes More Ground Jokes

What have you been doing" asked Jane. "Chasing a herd of elephants on vines" "Really?

Said Jane. "I thought elephants stayed on the ground!"

How do you get a kid to stay low to the ground?

DUCK!" How do you get a kid up and running "GOOSE!"

Skydiver Jokes More Skydiver Jokes

What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

Terminal Velocity Jokes More Terminal Velocity Jokes

Why did the skydiver die before reaching the ground?

Because he reached terminal velocity.

How fast can you travel in any direction in an airport?

Terminal velocity.