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Why did the Stormtrooper buy an iPhone?

Because he couldn't find the Droid he was looking for.

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What are your symptoms?

I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything!

Why did the gambler think he was in heaven?

He found his pair a' dice!

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What do walruses and tupperware have in common?

They're both looking for a tight seal.

Why did Horse Santa put his dentist on the naughty list?

You don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

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How does a man show he's planning for the future?

He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

What kind of bug wants to buy lawn turf?

A gras shopper.

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What kind of venereal disease does a Stormtrooper get?

An AT-STD.

Why did the Stormtrooper buy an iPhone?

Because he couldn't find the Droid he was looking for.