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Why do husbands typically die before their wives?

They want to.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did the Pilipino orphan boy say to the linguist who wanted to adopt him?

I'll tagalog!

Why didn't the cow want to go skydiving?

The steaks were too high.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Where are the groceries?

ME: Bacon was on sale. WIFE: Oh god, what does that mean *sound of dump truck backing into driveway*

What do you call a married knot?

Monotonous. Bonus answer from my wife: a noose.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did Beethoven do when he died?

Decompose.

Where do we go when we die?

In the ground.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why did the husband bring his wife's sick dog to the salon?

He was trying to get her pedicure.

What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband before she left her house to board the Challenger space shuttle?

You feed the dogs, and I'll feed the fish.