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Why do I always seem to start my day backwards?

I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

When is it time for bed at the Neverland Ranch?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

Why don't women sleep on the left side of the bed?

Because they always want to be right.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What's the similarities between Michael Jackson and the colour changing dress?

They both started out black and blue then became white and golden

What is the name of the event in which Hillary supporters move out of the US?

A start.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What time of day was Adam born?

Just a little before Eve

Why did the lonely man work on his days off?

X-post /r/dadjokes) He loved the company.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

Why do you need patience at the gym?

Because there is a lot of weighting. *sorry. i woke up at 2 am with this in my head.

What's long and hard every time you wake up?

Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to.