Why does the Asian News Anchor not stand up from behind his desk during presidential races?

Because he's covering an erection!

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Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

Why doesn't democracy work in China?

Because no one wants to hold an erection.

What do you get when you drop a baby into a wood chipper?

Well an erection of course.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why are farmers the best at what they do?

They are out standing in their field.

How do mesquite trees get taller?

They stand on their mesqui-toes!

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What do you say to a guy who is covered in rodents?

Mice outfit!

What covers the outside of a dogwood tree?

Bark.

Desk Jokes More Desk Jokes

How do you know when you're staying in a hillbilly hotel?

When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink," and the clerk replies, "okay, Go ahead."

What does it mean when an accountant is drooling out of both sides of his mouth?

His desk is level