Desk Jokes

How do you know when you're staying in a hillbilly hotel?

When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink," and the clerk replies, "okay, Go ahead."

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Why did you dump those vegetables on my desk?

Criminal: You said it was time to spill the beans.

What does it mean when an accountant is drooling out of both sides of his mouth?

His desk is level

Why are you sleeping at your desk?

Me: Because my bed is at home.

Why did the man put a clock under his desk?

He wanted to work overtime.

What did the floor say to the desk?

I can see your drawers!

Why did the engineer put a clock under his desk?

He wanted to work overtime.

What is the difference between the first and last desk of a viola section?

Half a measure.

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Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?

I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

What happens when two self-driving cars crash into each other?

RECALCULATING....*

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?

A chocolate BAAA

What's the name of the Russian Bee Gees cover band?

KGBGs

Raven Jokes More Raven Jokes

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Because they both drove Edgar Allen Poe straight into the grave.

What do you call a group of ravens?

Ray Lewis

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

What did one the left headphone say to the right headphone as they walked through a haunted house?

This place feels earie.

How do warty witches keep their hair out of place?

With scare spray.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's the difference between a tea bag and England?

A tea bag stays longer in a cup.

How does Optimus Prime stay young looking?

Autobotulism

Native American Jokes More Native American Jokes

What do you call it when you second guess your decision to book a stay at a Native American resort?

A reservation reservation reservation. Credit to Brian Regan, this is my favorite joke of his!

What do you have when you are having second thoughts about your booking on Native American land?

Reservation reservation reservations.

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

How Long Does It Take A Black Woman To Take A Dump?

9 months.

Where does the Lone Ranger take his trash?

To the dump, to the dump, to the dump, dump, dump.

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many public school teachers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Whatever it says in the book.

How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella. How long does it take them Days.