Why is a restless man in bed like a lawyer?

Because he lies on one side and then turns around and lies on the other one.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?

He wrote sheet music.

Why do I always seem to start my day backwards?

I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Why was the monster standing on his head?

He was turning things over in his mind.

What did the NFL Commissioner say when Adele turned down the Superbowl Halftime Show?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

How can you tell when Mitt Romney is lying?

His mouth is moving.

What lies on the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck! I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a lawyer?

Some adults like lawyers.

Why hasn't any lawyer ever been bitten by a shark?

Professional courtesy.