How do you get a black man to stop jumping on the bed?

Put velcro on the ceiling.

This joke may have profanity.
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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why does the nudist always go to bed early?

Because he never sleeps in much!

Why would you take a hammer to bed?

So you could hit the sack.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What happened to the minter who went crazy?

He stopped making cents.

What is something that basically stops when you stare at it, but flies by when you don't?

There are two answers: Time and Boo (from Mario games).

Black Man Jokes More Black Man Jokes

Why are Batman and black man different?

Bat man can go a whole night without robin

What's long and hard on a black man?

The third grade.

Ceiling Jokes More Ceiling Jokes

What did the ceiling fan say?

YEEEEAAAAH! GO CEILING! YOU NUMBER ONE BABY! WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!

Why do they want to relocate the Sistine chapel in Boston?

Because it's more than a ceiling

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

What do you say to the guy who just jumped in the septic tank?

Urine over your head!

Why doesn't Mexico have a good Olympic team?

Because all the ones that can run, jump and swim are already in America.

Velcro Jokes More Velcro Jokes

Why did the skinhead have Velcro on his boots?

He was a lacist.

What does velcro yell as it charges into battle?

ATTACH!