Ceiling Jokes

Why do they want to relocate the Sistine chapel in Boston?

Because it's more than a ceiling

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What did the ceiling fan say?

YEEEEAAAAH! GO CEILING! YOU NUMBER ONE BABY! WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!

How do you have a rave in Greece?

Blu-Tac a euro to the ceiling.

Why couldn't the glue hold the walls together?

Because it wasn't ceiling.

How do you start a rave party in Ethiopia?

Glue bread to the ceiling.

What noise does a ceiling fan make?

GO CEILING!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!! YOUR NUMBER ONE!! YAY, CEILING RULES!!!

Why did the bolt in the ceiling have to go to therapy?

Because it was screwed up!

How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?

When your nose touches the ceiling!

How do you stop black kids from jumping on the bed?

Put velcro on the ceiling.

How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?

Your head hits the ceiling!

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What was Nero's favorite kind of sandwich?

A Plebeian J

What do you get when you feed an Eevee a sandwich?

A Luncheon!

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Why do scuba divers always jump backwards off the boat?

If they jumped forwards, they would still be on the boat! Sorry.

Who survived?

The pilot who jumped out with a parachute.

Sistine Chapel Jokes More Sistine Chapel Jokes

Why do they want to relocate the Sistine chapel in Boston?

Because it's more than a ceiling

Boston Jokes More Boston Jokes

What's the best thing from New York City?

The train to Boston

What do you call a beautiful girl in Boston?

A tourist.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What kinds of people don't get invited to blonde parties?

Women!

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

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Wall Jokes More Wall Jokes

What should you do if your walls get cold?

Put on another coat.

Why do they say "character actress"?

Is that to differentiate them from all those actresses that only play walls and bits of furniture?

Africa Jokes More Africa Jokes

Where'd ya get it?

The parrot says, "Africa." (I don't know if you know this one, but I just heard it today)

Why are there so few casinos in Africa?

Too many cheetahs