Boston Jokes

Why do they want to relocate the Sistine chapel in Boston?

Because it's more than a ceiling

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Where's is Shaq's appearance most terrifying?

On a beach near Boston.

What's the difference between white socks and red socks?

Students will most likely answer the color) Then you say, "yes, that's one difference but there's another: The White Sox play in Chicago and the Red Sox play in Boston!

What has 6 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?

The Boston marathon finish line.

What did the fisherman from Boston say to the magician?

Pick a cod, any cod!

How do genetically engineered car salesmen from Boston greet their customers?

Hey, gattaca? GATTACA?

What does a pirate from Boston say?

Aaahhh.

Why can't the Maple Leafs have any tea?

Because Boston has all the cups!

Why don't the citizens of Boston build igloos?

Meh. They just aren't in' uit.

How long does it take to fly to Boston?

The clerk said "Just a minute..." "Thank you" the man said and hung up.

What do you call a beautiful girl in Boston?

A tourist.

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What's the best thing from New York City?

The train to Boston

Why don't British people pronounce their T's?

Because they're all in the Boston harbor.

Why is a Boston painting school so special?

Because everyone there is ahtistic.

What does a Boston terrier sound like?

Bahk bahk. Wicked bahk.

Why did the painter from Boston have trouble making friends?

He was way too autistic for his own good.

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Finish Line Jokes More Finish Line Jokes

What has five arms, three legs and a head?

The finish line at the Boston Marathon

What has 3 heads, 2 legs, and 4 arms?

The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

Why couldn't the pirate learn the alphabet?

Because he was always lost at C!

What did the pirate tell his littler sister when she asked if she could hold his parrot?

ISIS

Greet Jokes More Greet Jokes

How do you greet an overweight Micronesian when you're trying to sound cool?

Microsoft Word.

How did one pothead greet the other?

High

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What do you call 5 people sitting In two rows?

Tetris

What's the hardest part about winning crossfit?

Being 5 foot 6

Cod Jokes More Cod Jokes

Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space?

Because no one on earth wants to buy it.

What did the beaver say when he found out his new neighbour was a fish?

Cod dam

End Jokes More End Jokes

What begins at the end and ends at the beginning?

Back to school ads

What has a beginning and an end, but nothing in the middle?

Life.

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

What's the worst news for a NASCAR driver before a race?

The track is alright.

How many countries' flags make an appearance at every auto race in the world?

Two. Libya's to start the race, and France's to signal there's one lap to go.

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

What did the waiter say to the customer complaining about a dirty bowl?

This is unacceptable.

What did the butcher say when he handed his customer an empty pack of hotdogs on Halloween?

Happy halloweenie