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What the Girlfriend, the Mistress and the Wife say Girlfriend: Are you done already?

Mistress: Are you done yet Wife: Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige...

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the annoyed husband tell his wife after she saw elk falling from the sky?

Sigh* That's not elk... That's just reindeer.

What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

My girlfriend knows about my wife.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What did everyone think?

STEVE: PAUL: JANE: SARAH: MARK: DAVE:

How many magazines did the racquetball footwear company make before going out of business?

Tennis shoes (Also: can anyone think of a more succinct buildup It seems kinda unwieldy to me)

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call cow without a girlfriend?

Beef Stroken off

What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before getting married?

Feyonc

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

How did Mr Cheese paint his wife?

He Double Gloucester.

Why did the monster paint himself in rainbow colors?

Because he wanted to hide in the crayon box.

Ceiling Jokes More Ceiling Jokes

How do you start an Ethiopian rave?

You tape bread to the ceiling.

Why did the bolt in the ceiling have to go to therapy?

Because it was screwed up!

Mistress Jokes More Mistress Jokes

What did the carpet enthusiast say to his mistress?

I haven't had hard wood in 15 years.

Why did Einstein stop seeing his mistress?

She fell in love and he didn't anticipate entanglement