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Why did Einstein stop seeing his mistress?

She fell in love and he didn't anticipate entanglement

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why was the Chinese Journey cover band a failure?

Their only hit was Don't Stop Bereaving.

How do you stop a bull from charging?

Take away his credit card.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

Why do black people from west Africa never go on cruises?

They're not falling for that again.

Why doesn't Jesus like M&M's?

Because they fall through his hands.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why do you love me?

Wife: *shrugs* Me: Why do you find me annoying Wife: *reveals six spreadsheets and a pie chart*

Why do black men weep when they make love to white women?

Mace.

Mistress Jokes More Mistress Jokes

What's the definition of a Mistress?

Oh, I don't know. Probably something between a Mister and a mattress.

What the Girlfriend, the Mistress and the Wife say Girlfriend: Are you done already?

Mistress: Are you done yet Wife: Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige...

Einstein Jokes More Einstein Jokes

What's the difference between Einstein and Kim Kardashian?

Einstein is famous for special relativity, Kim is famous for simple reality tv.

What do you get when einstein jacks off?

A stroke of genius!!!!! (its terrible, i know)

Anticipate Jokes More Anticipate Jokes

Why did Einstein stop seeing his mistress?

She fell in love and he didn't anticipate entanglement

Why do I have to share a room with my twin sister?

ME: Because we only anticipated having one of you.