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Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!

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Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

Why did the little black kid start crying when he had diarrhea?

He thought he was melting.

Where did our son go?

What son *Dad cries with joy

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why didn't the cargo ship want to leave the bay?

Because it was a freight!

What is a centipedes's favorite Beatle song?

I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand...

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What did the hammer announce over the intercom to the evacuating screws screaming for help?

This is not a drill!

Why was the Doctor screaming angrily at his secretary?

He ran out of patients.

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

What do you call a guy who wears two condoms?

Justin Case

What's the worst thing a girl can wear to bed?

A condom

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the Mexican try to wear his taco?

He was dyslexic.

Why did the witch wear a green felt pointed hat?

So she could walk across snooker tables without being seen.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What did Richard Nixon say after he tried to make dinner at the White House for the first time?

I am not a cook

How do Batman's parents call him to dinner?

They don't they're dead.

Daddy Jokes More Daddy Jokes

Why was the Ancient Egyptian boy confused?

His daddy was a mummy

What does Frankenstein's monster call a screwdriver?

Daddy.

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

How many PA's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Nine........one to do it and eight others to wish they'd been asked.

What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

Yay Jokes More Yay Jokes

What noise does a ceiling fan make?

GO CEILING!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!! YOUR NUMBER ONE!! YAY, CEILING RULES!!!

Who wants to go out to dinner and scream and cry and make daddy wish he wore more condoms?

Kids: WE DO! YAY!