Why is PBS asking me for money?

If I had money I wouldn't need to pretend crow migration habits are good entertainment.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How much credibility is there in that whole "you can punch yourself handsome" theory?

Asking for a friend.

How do you get a Canadian to pay you back?

You ask.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why the hell did you buy a buffalo?

Me: I'd rather have a buffalo and not need it than need a buffalo and not have it.

What do you call an elephant that no one needs?

Irrelephant.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

He wanted cold hard cash!

How can you make money fast?

Glue it to the floor.

Pretend Jokes More Pretend Jokes

Why is PBS asking me for money?

If I had money I wouldn't need to pretend crow migration habits are good entertainment.

Why's the necrophiliac's blow up doll half inflated?

So he can pretend she's decomposing.