Why is PBS asking me for money?

If I had money I wouldn't need to pretend crow migration habits are good entertainment.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why do people always ask me for directions?

I have no clue where I am going. I am sure i have sent 100's of people into the ocean.

When do accountants laugh out loud?

When somebody asks for a raise

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't need a lightbulb when I have the furnace ready.

What's the difference between Jesus and the painting of the Last Supper?

You only need one nail to hang the painting.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why should you never take a swordfish out to dinner?

Because you'll get stuck with the bill, and if you don't have money to pay the restaurant will call the cods on you. Fin.

How much money does the Treasurer of the United States make?

All of it.

Pretend Jokes More Pretend Jokes

What do you call someone who's pretending to be from Sicily?

Amoxicillin

What do you call spaghetti pretending to be rigatoni?

An impasta