Why won't you read this joke?

Cause you've already reddit!

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Whats the V in DVD stand for?

Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today.. be kind)

What's the difference between Reddit and 9Gag?

About 5 seconds.

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How do you tell a joke about ISIS?

It's all about the execution

What's the difference between a joke and your friend's blog?

You enjoy it when a joke is posted on Facebook

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Why does the lead singer of Sublime hate tennis?

Cause love is what I got

What's the same with 9/11 and Goliath and the giant?

They were both caused by a message from god.

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Why are so many Italians named Tony?

Because when they immigrated from Italy, customs stuck a label on their lapel reading ToN.Y.

Why do soviet policemen travel in groups of three?

One to read, one to write, and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.