How did Christopher Columbus find India?

He used Apple Maps.

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What do you call people who use the "pull out" method for contraception?

Parents.

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...

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Why did the Red sea not find a good husband?

Because she was too shallow.

Why did the clown cross the road?

To find his rubber chicken.

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What is the difference between St. Patrick and Christopher Columbus?

One drove all the snakes from Ireland, the other drove away all of the Native Americans.

How did Christopher Columbus find India?

He used Apple Maps.

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What's the best dating service in India?

Connect the dots. (I'll see my self out.)

Why did the cannibal get food poisoning in India?

He ate Rameet!