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How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

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What game are you watching?

I wonder what she thought I was doing with my hands.

What do you do to relax?

I enjoy people watching. - The most relaxing thing for me is singing in the shower. - I know.

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Why can't Albert Einstein drive?

Because he never learned.

What's your biggest weakness?

Interviewee: "I never learn from my mistakes" Interviewer: "Oh, why's that " Interviewee: "I never make any"

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How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

Why is an executioner a terrible high-fiver?

He always leaves you hanging

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What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot.

How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

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Whats the difference between a noose and a leash?

How high you tie it on a tree.

Why was the actor pleased to be on the gallows?

Because at last he was in the noose.