Knot Jokes

What kind of knots only exist in space?

Astro-knots.

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What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot.

How do you stop an elephant going through the eye of a needle?

By tying a knot on its tail.

What did the shoelace say when I tried to tie it?

Uh, like, can you knot?

What do you call an Aztec Mayan snake god tied in a knot?

Pretzalcoatl

What do you call a Sailor's hitch in the arctic?

Knot cool

How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

What's a sailor's favorite kind of knot?

It's a tie.

What do you call a pretzel with roofies in it?

Forget-me-knots!

Why do dogs make good sailors?

They know their knots.

What type of knot do you tie in space?

An astronaut.

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String Jokes More String Jokes

What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot.

Who won the race between two balls of string?

They we're tied!

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

What did the hat say to the tie?

You hang around. I'll go on a head.

What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?

A boo-tie.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of wine causes the most accidents?

Shartonnay

What kind of olives do I like?

Olive them

Astro Knot Jokes More Astro Knot Jokes

What kind of knots only exist in space?

Astro-knots.

What do they do with rope in space?

Tie Astro-knots.

Sailor Jokes More Sailor Jokes

Why do sailors give their wives a bouqet of ropes instead of flowers?

It's a bouqet of forget-me-knots.

What is the difference between a blind man and a sailor in prison?

One can't see to go the other can't go to sea.

Needle Jokes More Needle Jokes

What are Bill Gates latest projects?

Needle upscaling and camel miniaturization.

Why did the nun swallow a needle?

So she could know what it's like to have a prick inside her.

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why don't they let gansters play Quidditch?

Cause gangsters always catch the snitch!

Why didn't Noah let the Tasmanian devil in?

He was not an archdevil.

Tail Jokes More Tail Jokes

Why are dogs bad at poker?

Because they wag their tails whenever they have a good hand. Why did John's dog win the poker tournament Because he's a Doberman.

Where does a dog go when he loses his tail?

A retail store.