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How did the flea learn to use the internet?

He had to start from scratch.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Why don't astronauts keep their jobs very long?

Because as soon as they start they get fired.

How do you get rid of an itch?

Start from scratch.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why does Ms. Piggy use honey and vinegar douche?

Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork.

What did soviet russians use for lighting before they started using candles?

Electricity.

Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

What would George Washington do if he were alive right now?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

What would Joan Rivers be doing if she was alive right now?

Scratching at the inside of her coffin. Courtesy of my dad.

Internet Jokes More Internet Jokes

What are the four elements?

Pupil: Fire Earth Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet Pupil: Well Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net I'm in my element.

How does a tree access the internet?

It logs on.

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

When are you going to learn to drive?

I don't think they feel very safe in my taxi.

What's accounting?

Something Italians learn in preschool.

Flea Jokes More Flea Jokes

What did one amorous flea say to the other?

I love you aw-flea.

How to fleas travel?

Itch hiking!