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How did you prepare for today?

Red carpet question with "Cocaine and sit ups." #GoldenGlobes

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Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's blue, small and sits in a corner?

A baby with its hand in the power socket.

What do you get when you sit on a potato?

A potato wedge! (I made this up when I was 9)

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

How does the balance sheet of a bank look like as of today?

On the left side there's nothing right and on the right side there's nothing left...

How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes?

Elementary, my dear Watson.

Prepare Jokes More Prepare Jokes

How does NASA prepare for an organized event?

They planet!

What's the difference between an astronaut and a NASA intern?

One's constantly preparing for lunch.

Cocaine Jokes More Cocaine Jokes

What's the difference between a 5 year old kid and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window.

Why should you tell bad jokes to cocaine addicts?

Because they'll crack up anyways

Up Jokes More Up Jokes

How did you prepare for today?

Red carpet question with "Cocaine and sit ups." #GoldenGlobes

How did the hail stone describe it's life?

It really has a lot of ups and downs