How do you find a dirty cop?

Call 911, it doesn't matter who answers

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What did the farmer say when the police found the gate from the public footpath in his barn and accused him of stealing?

That's not my stile.

Why did The Walrus go to a Tupperware party?

He wanted to find a tight seal.

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What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

You stop milking a cow after 10 years.

Why was 10 afraid?

Because it was in the middle of 9/11

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What's the difference between a roasted chicken and a time bomb?

If you don't know the answer please never invite me to dinner.

Which Shampoo They Preferred?

The Top Answers Was: Get The Hell Out Of My Bathroom!

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What happens if I put a vial in another vial and then in another vial?

It doesn't matter.

Where do you go to meet the best fish?

It doesn't matter - any old plaice will do.