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How do you make a girl gain weight?

Marry her.

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Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

Why does a girls rub her eyes in the morning?

A. Because they don't have balls to itch.

What do you give a girl that has everything?

Penicillin

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why can't a guy see his friends?

Because he's married.

What kind of fruit can't get married?

A Cantleope

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

Why can't you lift weights on Monday?

It's a week day.

Why do you need patience at the gym?

Because there is a lot of weighting. *sorry. i woke up at 2 am with this in my head.

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

Why doesn't Hermione keep her money at Gringotts?

Offshore investment gains a better return.