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How do you make a girl gain weight?

Marry her.

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Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What is the difference between a girl and a washer?

The washer doesn't follow you around after you put a load in it.

What's that movie about the girl who forgets Adam Sandler every day?

I want to know her secret

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

What do you get when ant's parents won't let him marry his girlfriend?

Antelopes.

Why did Albert Einstein marry his cousin?

Because she was his relative

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

Why couldn't Cauchy lose any weight?

Because every time he saw a street pole he imagined two pies.

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

How do you get an anorexic to gain 25 pounds?

Marry her.