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How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

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Snail Jokes More Snail Jokes

Why arent there any French Restaurants in Davy Jones Locker?

Dead men sell no snails!

How do snails get their shells all shiny?

They use snail Polish.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What Happens when the Cubs win the World Series?

They Leave a Trail of Tears

Who would win in a race?

The Tortoise or the Reddit Servers

Hillary Jokes More Hillary Jokes

What did Monica say to Hillary before Election Day?

Don't blow it

How does Hillary's email server feel?

Removed

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

Why doesn't Mexico have a team in the summer Olympics?

Because all the ones who can run, jump or swim are ready in the US.

Why do grandparents have so many clocks?

So they won't run out of time

Race Jokes More Race Jokes

Why do the ghosts never win races?

Because they're always dead tired. I stole this from plain and simple. Just straight up stole it. Why? Because it made me laugh and I didn't see it posted here before.

What does a slave owner do with his slaves when he's finished with them?

Races 'em.